My anniversary today...

Today, 26/11/2007 – Our 2nd Anniversary… an achievement… Alhamdulillah.

On our wedding day...


Raya, 13/11/2007


Last night, I could not sleep much. Sepu was still on the road at 1.30 am… He started his journey to Jengka at around 6.30, and came back to KL at 10 something. I called him more than 3 times, to ask for their destination. They arrived at Bukit Jalil at about 2 am. Sepu did not call me, he insisted that he sent me an sms, but I could not find anything from him. But at least I know that he’s at home, and getting ready to sleep…

This morning, I woke up quite late… called Sepu to wake him up, but, as usual, he’ll go back to sleep until he’s ready… just like babies… couldn’t imagine how my baby would be like. Will the baby be as sound a sleeper as the father, or as light as the mother? Ermmm… we’ll see. Hopefully, she’ll be like the father when she’s still the baby, but easier to wake her up once she’s grown up… She has lots of deep sleeper (plus not easy to wake up) DNA in her, the grandmother (my mother) the auntie (ibu dedek) and the uncle (ami aedun)… My father falls asleep easily, but it’s not hard to wake him up though…

What else happened today? The first time baby kicked my rib, and it was painful. But she kicked just once. Good baby!

About the baby’s name? If it’s a girl as predicted, it would be… surprise!

Exhausted...

Feel really exhausted today. I have been working on these pump packages for 4 weeks straight… working on weekends till late afternoon… 7pm? 8pm? 9pm? Just pick the time, and I can ask the AP office to show you my card swipe record. Can’t wait for the 60 days paid leave? Ermmm… I hope that I will not be thinking about work during that period.

I have never taken sick leave, applied leave only twice this year, the first one being 1 day in September, just to spend longer weekend with Sepu in KL, and the 2nd being the 8 days raya leave. Thought of applying leave on Monday 24th December, as Sepu will be in Miri for the whole week… yesss!!! I’m still in the counting weeks mode, and will soon transform into the counting days mode starting 28th December… goshhh… how time flies…

I’m missing Sepu everyday… every hour, especially lately… maybe it’s the hormone, or maybe, really, I’ve been through life as fortnightly wife for too long, and it’s the way my system tells me it’s time to stop living this way. I thought of applying for jobs in KL, but most people advised me to wait for the conversion, and then ask for transfer… ermmm… it will not be for another 5 months…

Zakiah is moving back to Bintulu, by end of next week. Lucky her… we’ve only been talking about living near to family like a week before she broadcasted the news that she’s moving out…

Today is a great day...

When i read about my frustrations below, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing hard...

Sepu got his leave approved, but with conditions... he will need to get his work done before going. People advised him to cancel his leave and his ticket, but... i was the one who bought the ticket, and really it cost me a lot of money... MAS tickets nowadays going up like 'soyuz'... better buy them at travel agent then buying them thru the internet, especially during holiday seasons...

Arriving at 11.10pm last night, he’s so excited looking at my ever-expanding belly… I felt really blessed last night, and could sleep even better than any babies (assumption).

Prediction at Week 26, its baby boy… and today, it’s a girl… ehehe… I just don’t care of the gender, what I do care is that the baby is healthy and doing fine… and I am healthy, and look ‘strong’, said George just now.

I am really tired right now. Don’t know how to describe the fatigue. It has been 2 weeks since I’ve got decent rest on weekends… so, how about this weekend then… ermmmm not sure! I have the feeling that this weekend would be hectic with shopping and going places -> Brunei.

I am counting minutes now, it’s 15.38pm, and I plan to go home as early as 4pm today. I’m having my break, hope that nobody will judge me… just because I go home early once in a while.

What am I going to do tonight? Arranging the furniture should they come today? Ermmm… whatever…

What is Sepu doing at home? He went to the Lutong Clinic just now, being prescribed cough syrup… so, I guess, he is now ‘busy’ sleeping.

15 minutes to go… what a day ;)

Frustrations... Shattered hopes for the week...

This week starts with frustration and may end with frustrations as well…

Monday, it was the liaison officer case… my paper should have been submitted to JTC, but because of lack of common sense by somebody I presume, the paper is further delayed to next week. But the problem is, there will be no JTC next week… so, the frustration expanded into a massive balloon ready to explode… I will have to endure the waiting for the 12/11/2007 JTC then…

Tuesday, that’s today… Sepu called me this morning, telling me that his ‘cuti’ has not been approved by his supervisor. What kind of supervisor is that, realizing that his subordinate lives far apart from his wife, and needs to be with his wife especially during this time, when his wife is 7 months pregnant? A cruel one indeed… I’ve prepared my heart and soul for my husband to come this weekend, a long one since 3 weeks ago… 3 weeks… really, where’s the consideration of a leader, a boss? I just could not describe the frustration… I cried and could not utter any words… luckily I’ve done with my Pump ARR, so, the frustration could only affect the mood, and not the work.

I should have gone to the specialist yesterday, for my monthly check up… but because of him coming back to Miri on Wednesday, I’ve changed the appointment to Thursday… and now?

I just don’t know what to expect anymore. I dream of this weekend together, I’ve prayed for the Wednesday to come as fast as the days could pass… but none of the dream and prayer seems to materialize now… NONE!

I’ve never mentioned about any flaws in our relationship… Never… cause there never was any flaw… Our frustrations come / came from others… and the frustration of not having this weekend with him is a big thing to me… something that next week could never compensate…

Frustrations forecast…
Wednesday, he should have come to Miri tonight! Even bought new pillows for him, so that we would not ‘quarrel’ over pillows and blanket…

Thursday, plan of having breakfast and lunch and dinner with him… and going to Columbia Asia, for him to see the baby moving for the first time… Don’t you pity us? He has never seen his baby moving in the womb… the first and only time he’s there with me during ultrasound was at Week 7… and now, I’m into my 30th Week… goshhhh…

Friday, plan of going to my relatives’ house for the closing of Syawal… but??? Plan of going to Courts Mammoth and buy mattresses for the double decker, buy sofa set… buy my wardrobe, and baby’s wardrobe…

Saturday, plan of no more weekend working today… just for him… plan of going to Brunei… but? Plan of arranging our new furniture (should they arrive today)… and plan to move my big fridge to the kitchen, as I would like to decorate the back room for my auntie… plan to … whatever… I’ve forgotten most of my plans…

Sunday, plan to have nasi lemak as breakfast… plan to just relax as he’d be going back tonight… plan….