ahahah perli yer?

"ermmm... perli ye yang?"

Boss is not in today... and i've been having the sickness of 'no drive' to work since Sepu insisted for me to come and work in KL... I've made my request known to the bosses... and now i am in the mode of letting them to decide...

I've gone to KL twice since Irdina but sometimes, people need to be really 'down to earth' to be really thankful with what have been given, and to not go beyond the line of hoping and wanting for more... ermmm... i can only call what i have now a whole family once we are reunited again... living in the same home, everyday, everynight, except for occasional outstation traveling for work.

Activities with Irdina have become more and more intriguing... Her response makes me crave for more time at home than work. ermmm... but, playing with her alone, without having her father around is frustrating.

I have not even a few minutes free time at home. Afer picking her up from the baby sitter, my second job starts till about 9pm everynight. Irdina will wake up 3 times whenever her nose is clear, and nearly every hour when its blocked... and these two nights were terrible... she cried when she's irritated with her nose... and will refuse any attempt to feed her directly (she's still breastfeeding)... kesian anak mama... sometimes i just off the aircond, but she will wake up just as much, sweating... feeling uncomfortable... what should i do then?

Some people can only judge... and said that this is the thrill of becoming a mom... ermmm... I am alone here, and everytime, everything, I am on my own, without helper, without relief... ermmm... please let me wrok in KL ohhh boss... please... at least i can trade sleep with Sepu once in a while (as if laaa)... wuaaaaa... tensionnyaaaa!!!

Some people suggest feeding her formula instead of breastmilk at night... some even suggest adding food in her milk when she wakes up at night... WHATTTT!!! I have this sentiment of automatically blocking these kind of advices from ever entering my system... I dont mind waking up at night to feed her (CAN OR CAN'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?)... but her blocked nose makes the waking up become more intense, and more frequent...

ermmm... feeling like going home now... need some rest, and need to express milk for the afternoon... meet again in four months time (like Sepu said)...

Again, superstition!!!

I have just returned from my quality time with Irdina… and of course, at her babysitter’s house.

While playing with her at the verandah, the babysitter, an old lady (about 80 years of age) bombarded me with old wives tales, stressing in particularly… “Don’t ever mention or tell anybody that your daughter looks like you…” ermmm… she then proceed with “if somebody tells me that my child resembles me, I will just say, “No, she looks more like monkey””… WHATTT??? As usual, I am not a kind of person who likes confrontation, so I just kept quiet.

WHY? To ever tell people, that your children resembles monkey? Why can’t we just accept the truth, and tell the truth? Why do we have to be so and so and so superstitious, even for something like this? I was really dumbstruck… ohhh goshhh… for people who pray 5 times a day, who believe in Allah, still… they believe in something as animistic as this… they are afraid that the child might fall sick, or something bad would happen to the child just because the mother tells people that her baby looks like her, or as beautiful as her!!! ehem ehem... :p

I’ve been taught since I was a little girl not to say that the chubby little baby as “sihatnya dia”… instead of saying that, I should be saying “jaiknya badannya!!!”… JAIK means BURUK in Bahasa Melayu Sarawak… When will people start to believe in themselves, stop pretending and start to acknowledge the truth?

This kind of people still don’t let babies take bath when they got fever… they are afraid that the fever will move from the skin to the inside of her body… wo goshhh… how am I going to teach these people biology, anatomy of human’s body? How could a fever subside if you keep the baby in warm blanket, and turn off the fan? Oh my… Please take good care of my baby…

I don't deny that they take good care of my baby… and sometimes give me good tips on how to take care of her. I am not saying that I know better… but I don’t like it when people start to talk nonsense…